Be My Now
I want to wake up and roll over into your arms. Press my head against your chest and inhale the scent that will become my grounding. Your body heat will warm the forever frozen surface of my heart and I will smile because somehow you’ve still gotten under it. I want to watch you sleep and close my eyes to the sight; just a few more minutes with your face imprinted on my eyelids. I just want to lay with you and forget my past, scattered with glittering bottle shards and drugs dusting the floor of memory lane. I want to pull you tighter, my scarred arms kissing the fabric of your tee shirt, my semi healed burn marks aching to be touched. When you wake up, will you kiss them? My scars? When they hurt from the inside will you rub them and when they itch and I can’t help scratching, will you tap my hand to get me to stop? Will you kiss my tattoos, especially my favorite one? The one that require you be behind me? Will you listen to me when I’m done writing and I need you to be my first audience member? Will you remember that when I can’t meet your eyes its out of embarrassment- I don’t ever get this intimate with anyone?
I want to watch as you open your eyes. I want to catch me staring. I want to smile and hide my face and I want to feel you pull me tighter. No words needed or wanted, I’ll cuff your face and caress your cheek, my eyes searching yours. Sun filtering in, dust motes drifting around and the sound of NYC moving along with its rambunctious routine. Be my love. Be my home. Be my now.